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Inuyasha, "The Unquiet Winds" chapter 25: The Sleeping Elixir, rated T
Title: The Unquiet Winds
Chapter Title: The Sleeping Elixir
Characters: Sesshoumaru, Kagura's reincarnation (inevitable Kagura/Sesshoumaru), Shippou
Genre: Romance/Supernatural/Suspense
Rating: PG-13 (overall)
Universe: Canon AU/divergence, Modern
Notes: This serial has been completed for
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Additional Notes: Thank you to
Story Summary: Natsumi dreams of another woman's past, a woman who desperately wants to reunite with the man she loves, even if Natsumi has to suffer in the end.
Links: (RECOMMENDED) FFNet | AO3

Sesshoumaru and Shippou followed Achika into her shrine, and she led them to a newer addition to the shrine, a greenhouse with many herbs and plants. As they all stepped into the greenhouse, the humidity hit them immediately, as well as the fragrant scent of many different flowers.
Achika moved around the space with intention already, scooping up herbs and mumbling to herself on what she needed next.
“If the former spirit of the youkai is restless and trying to gain control, there is a way we can at least put her troubled spirit to sleep so that Natsumi-san can at least have some peace,” Achika said.
“And that way is… herbs?” Shippou guessed.
Achika nodded. “I will create a blend of tea leaves, but be aware that this tea is more like an elixir, as it will have spiritual power behind the intention. The spirit energy will keep the youkai’s powers at bay.”
“Will it make Kagura sleep forever as long as Minora-san has the tea?” Sesshoumaru asked, his gaze sweeping across the entire greenhouse.
Achika shook her head. “Unfortunately Natsumi-san cannot just drink spiritual tea forever. I do not know the side effects, but I know that over time, her humanity will gain an immunity to the strength of it, thus allowing Kagura’s spirit to return.” Achika said, grabbing leaves and sprigs of anise, St. John's Wort, bay leaves and other herbs Sesshoumaru didn’t recognize at first.
“This is only a temporary solution,” Achika said. “She will at least be able to speak with you without intense pain, Sesshoumaru-dono.”
“That is ideal, but what of a long term solution?” Sesshoumaru said. “Minora-san cannot live her life forever warring with Kagura, and if she is to… help me, I would prefer to be by her side.”
Achika shot him a gentle smile. “Well, we’ll have to think of a good solution to that, but I have an idea.”
Shippou and Sesshoumaru watched her as she gathered the rest of the herbs and led them back into the main part of the shrine, ending up in her kitchen where she began to set out the herbs to dry. She turned around to them and leaned on her counter.
“One way or another Natsumi-san and Kagura will have to come to an agreement,” Achika said.
“How can they even do that?” Shippou asked, his face scrunching in confusion.
Achika let out a long sigh and looked out the window of her shrine’s kitchen. “The answer is within Natsumi-san. She has to fight for herself and take control. She needs to be strong, in mind and spirit, otherwise Kagura will surely take her over.”
Shippou scratched his head. “I still don’t know how she can even do that.”
Achika turned to them both. “You need to bring her here, and I can set up a place for her to meditate and meet Kagura on a spiritual plane. After that, it’s up to Natsumi-san.”
She turned to Sesshoumaru and her expression turned serious. “You’ll need to talk to her, Sesshoumaru-sama. Get as much out of her as you can and then bring her here. I don’t know what unfinished business you have with Kagura, but in Natsumi, if you truly want this girl to save you, you have to be on her side and guide her. At least let her get to know you so that she wants to save you.”
Sesshoumaru nodded, but Achika’s words moved him deeply. She was right. How was he going to get this woman, practically a stranger, to even want to save him? Helping her with Kagura may not be enough. She had to know him to want that. Kagura once had loved him, but Natsumi knew nothing about him.
Why would she even want to help him when all he’d done was bring her trouble?
Achika ushered them out of the shrine, assuring them she’d be in contact when the elixir tea was ready. In the meantime, she needed a day or two to make it and imbue it with her spiritual energy, so she left them at the gates of her shrine, more anxious than ever.
However, this time Sesshoumaru had hope. Perhaps they really could help Natsumi free herself from Kagura’s spirit and then he could appeal to her. He only hoped that she would consider at least being his friend, if not more. He had to have her with him; his life surely depended upon it.
---
“Here,” Shippou said, setting down a glass bottle with a cork stopper. Natsumi looked at the bottle in front of her with curiosity. In fact, Natsumi was cautious about meeting Shippou at all. He had called her out the blue and insisted she meet him at the library. When she arrived, he ushered her to a private room in the basement where they kept archives and microfiche. She didn’t know what to expect, but Shippou seemed sincere and even a little excited.
“What’s this?” she asked, picking up the bottle and observing different dried herbs, flowers, and stalks inside.
“It’s tea created by a Shinto miko imbued with her holy power,” Shippou said. “According to the miko, it should help you be around Sesshoumaru without getting sick. Essentially it puts Kagura’s soul to sleep temporarily so she has no power to cause you pain.”
Natsumi gaped as she looked at him. “Really? Does it work?”
“Achika is a very skilled miko and she is a descendant of very powerful priestesses traced back to the feudal era. I am, of course, well versed in her family’s history...” Shippou shot her a knowing grin.
“And when I drink this tea I can … I won’t feel the pain?” Natsumi asked. She longed for her old life again before she encountered Sesshoumaru and started to not only have the disturbing dreams, but realize she had a violent, troubled spirit within her body vying to take her over.
“It’s temporary,” Shippou said. “Of course, over a short time, when your body naturally dispels the contents of the tea, the spirit energy will also fade, thus allowing Kagura to come back to full power.”
Natsumi sighed heavily, obviously displeased. “If it’s temporary, what’s the point of it?” She put the bottle of herbs down on the table and glared at it. “If I can’t stop Kagura completely, why am I even bothering?”
Shippou cleared his throat. “You could talk to Sesshoumaru and learn more about Kagura and how to finally ease her spirit. He can help you make sure that Kagura doesn’t completely take over your body.”
“Oh! Well, in that case, if he can help me with that,” Natsumi said, and Shippou could tell that Natsumi was starting to feel some hope and ease.
“Like I said, this is a temporary solution,” Shippou said. “This elixir should help sedate Kagura long enough for you to talk to Sesshoumaru and have him help you with Kagura’s spirit permanently.”
“So what do I do?” Natsumi asked, picking up the herbs again. She wasn’t much of a tea drinker, but if this could help her ease the pain and solve this problem for good, she’d do it. Although she was hesitant to get more involved with Sesshoumaru, technically she didn’t have anything against him. He seemed like a good person and he was caring to her when she passed out at work and was ill. Of course, he had ulterior motives, but his motives felt more like responsibility than anything. Natsumi didn’t sense anything malicious in his true intentions.
“Well, I suggest brewing the tea as soon as you get home. Drink a whole pot of it, and you should start to feel like yourself again, you know, without an extra youkai spirit hovering over you,” Shippou said. He pulled a slip of yellow paper that had a number on it. “Then, you should call this number.”
Natsumi took the slip of paper cautiously. “This is Sesshoumaru’s number, isn’t it?” Shippou nodded at her.
Shippou continued, “Talk to him and tell him you’ve taken the elixir. He will come to you and test it out to see if it works. If you still feel pain, he will have the miko try again.”
“Okay,” she said, nodding once. “I understand.”
“I would do it sooner rather than later when you leave here,” Shippou said. “Sesshoumaru would come at any time, and he’s anxious to help you.”
“That’s the one thing I still can’t figure out,” Natsumi said. “Why me? He could just let Kagura take me over and they could be together.” She shook her head and sighed as Shippou watched her.
“Well, that’s something you and Sesshoumaru need to discuss,” Shippou said. “I know his reasons, but it’s better if it comes from him, and not me.” When Natsumi still looked uneasy, Shippou added, “Don’t worry. I’ve known Sesshoumaru a long time. Neither one of us means you any trouble. We just want to help.”
“I understand, it’s just...overwhelming,” she admitted.
“I get that, but we don’t want you to suffer anymore. Kagura’s soul needs to be at rest, and we know you can’t do it alone,” Shippou said.
Well, he was right about that. She couldn’t do this alone. She wouldn’t even know where to begin without their help, and if Shippou was right about Sesshoumaru, she could really benefit from his knowledge.
“Alright,” she said, rising from the chair of the library and holding the bottle of herbs to her chest. She gave Shippou a defiant look. “I’m going home, and then I’ll do this. I’ll call Sesshoumaru as soon as I can.”
A bright smile erupted on Shippou’s face. He nodded to her. “Good, and you have my number as well. Call me if you need anything, but honestly it’s Sesshoumaru who can help you the most.”
“Understood,” Natsumi said, and she felt Shippou’s eyes watching her as she exited the library doors.
---
The tea kettle whistled and Natsumi set the herbs in her strainer within the pot. She let it steep for a few minutes, resisted the temptation to add honey, but decided to pour herself a cup. She knew she had to drink the whole teapot, so she laid out some biscuits to go with it.
After the first two cups of tea, her anxiety lessened and her mind became clearer. She imagined herself in an open field by a babbling brook, taking in the calming sounds of nature. She searched inside her mind for Kagura, and she could not sense the woman’s energy, nor did she feel any pain. Only a cup of the tea remained, so she sipped on it and revelled in the feeling of wholeness and calm that she hadn’t experienced in weeks, not since she’d encountered Sesshoumaru.
She thought about him, and usually a dull ache would pierce through her core and she’d feel a headache coming over. This time, she felt none of those things, and actually her body warmed when she thought of all the times she’d encountered him. She couldn’t believe it. She didn’t feel any contempt or anger toward him either. She didn’t feel the fear to flee from him and save herself from the pain being in his presence would cause.
She glanced at the paper with his number and felt like it was time to call him.
“Minora-san?” A shiver ran through her body as he said her name.
“Hello, Sesshoumaru-san. I’ve taken the tea, and I don’t… I don’t feel Kagura’s presence. It’s like she’s not even there,” she said. She inhaled a huff of air. “I don’t feel any pain either, talking to you.”
“This is good. So the elixir worked,” Sesshoumaru said, and he seemed relieved. She idly wondered why.
“It seems so. I wish… I wish this could be permanent. I feel like myself again,” she admitted.
“I understand,” he said, and his voice was soft and soothing. There was a heavy pause on the phone, but finally Sesshoumaru wasted no more time. “It will wear off, but before it does, I need to see you, Minora-san.”
“Yes, Shippou-san told me,” she said. Her head was swimming in calmness and clarity, and she knew what she had to do. “You know where I live, right? Sesshoumaru-san, will you please come over? I’m sure you want to talk about this, and I want to figure this out at soon as possible.”
“Yes,” he said. “I will be there in ten minutes. If you have any more tea, please finish it. I will try to stay as long as Kagura’s spirit is lulled inside.”
“Hmm,” she said agreeably.
“I do not want to cause you any more pain, Minora-san,” he said delicately.
“Right, I’ll be here,” she said dazedly. Then, she added, “Please, call me Natsumi-san.”
She felt they were past formalities now, and she hated when he called her Minora-san. For some reason, it didn’t feel right.
When Sesshoumaru arrived at her apartment, her eyes widened at his appearance. He no longer looked like her boss, with his long black hair pulled back while wearing a crisp, clean suit. Instead, his hair was silver and he had markings on his face, looking like one of the pictures from history books as if he stepped out of the page. He wore more modern clothing, with a loose black T-shirt and well-fitted gray slacks. His hair flowed freely and naturally, not a hair out of place, over his broad shoulders.
“I apologize for startling you with my appearance,” he said immediately.
“No it’s just… your hair… it’s really lovely,” she stammered and felt her cheeks warm from a blush. She looked around to see if any of her neighbors were gawking and then added, “Please, you’re welcome to come inside.”
She pulled back as he followed her inside, removing his shoes.
“Pardon the intrusion,” he said. His gaze swept quickly over her tidy, homey little apartment and then he met her eyes. “Natsumi-san…”
“There,” she said, and he cocked an eyebrow. She smiled. “See? That’s better than Minora-san.”
He watched her for a beat and she saw a faint smile tug at his lips. “Yes, it is. It is also better that I can talk to you finally without causing you distress.”
Natsumi felt herself shivering again in his presence. His gentle voice, his piercing golden eyes, and the way he watched her were stirring up feelings for which she was ill-accustomed. It was strange having a gorgeous man stare at her and even regard her like Sesshoumaru was doing now.
“Did you finish all the tea as instructed?” he asked, slicing through the tension between them as if he still had a sword from feudal times.
“Uh, yes, it was wonderful tea, but the best part is I don’t feel Kagura’s presence right now,” Natsumi said, and she looked away uncomfortably. “I know you said this is temporary, but it feels… it feels like I could function normally now.”
Sesshoumaru was hovering in her foyer and continued to watch her, almost as if she was a science experiment. She lingered closer to her living area.
“Would you like to sit down?” she held her hand to direct him to her sofa. “I’m sure we have a lot to talk about.”
“Yes, thank you,” he said with a light bow. Her eyes followed him as he sat gently at the end of her sofa. Not wanting to infringe in his personal space, Natsumi sat on the other side with a cushion in between them.
“I don’t know where to start,” she said plainly. “I know that Kagura wants to take over my body, but I feel that it’s only possible if she knows you’re near and that she has a chance to be with you. I’m sorry for this trouble. I feel like I’m a huge inconvenience in all of this, and I really don’t understand this reincarnation and youkai stuff. I’m just a normal person. I’m ordinary and don’t have talents or beauty or anything like that.”
“Natsumi-san, let me be clear,” he said to her. “You are not an inconvenience. What Kagura’s soul is doing to you is not right. I have seen this before, but there was magic behind it.”
“You have?” she asked.
He continued, “Yes, a dark priestess brought back the soul of a powerful miko into the body of her reincarnation. It was not successful with some intervention, but if the spell had been completed, it could have been detrimental to the soul of the miko’s reincarnation,” he said.
He shook his head. “Nevermind that for now. The difference here is that Kagura was once a youkai born of another abominable youkai. Her soul was redeemed and she died in peace. However, her spirit has been following me around for centuries. Only recently has she been able to reincarnate.”
“I did not know that youkai could reincarnate,” Natsumi mused aloud. “I thought that was only for humans.”
“We cannot,” Sesshoumaru said, turning away from her stare. “We are considered like gods and we have already ascended, so we are unable to join the wheel of reincarnation.”
“Oh, I see. I’m sorry,” she said, realizing that Sesshoumaru’s mood had shifted and he had tensed from the subject. She knew that she’d hit a nerve, but instead of looking angry, he looked pensive and lost in thought.
“Kagura is a special case, and the other youkai I have consulted with cannot explain how she was able to reincarnate,” he continued. “I suspect that it is because Kagura was born of unnatural means. She redeemed herself at the end of her unnatural life and defied her creator. I suppose the fates saw some merit in her sacrifice.”
“I see, so I’m her next incarnation,” Natsumi observed.
“Yes,” he affirmed. “She is obviously a young soul, but here you are like any other human. However, because of Kagura’s special nature, it seems as though your past life’s memories were not washed away. This is from Kagura’s magic. She did not want you to forget her struggles and her sacrifice.”
“It’s all so weird,” Natsumi said. “I remember everything for the most part, when she lets me. I even remember feelings. It’s all too much sometimes.”
“I’d imagine,” he said, finally meeting her eyes again.
“So what do I do?” Natsumi asked. “How do I get her soul to be asleep forever and then I can live my own life?”
“According to the miko who made your herbal tea, you will eventually have to come to terms with Kagura. Your soul and hers must come to an understanding,” Sesshoumaru said.
“That’s… that’s not going to be easy,” Natsumi said, her hope starting to dwindle. “She’s way more powerful than I am, and she’s persistent. Plus, she has love to fight for. I… I only have my ordinary life.” She rested her hands in her lap and turned away from Sesshoumaru’s piercing gaze again.
She felt him shift closer to her on the sofa, and his strong hand lightly rested on her shoulder.
His voice was gentle and Natsumi shuddered under his touch. “As long as I’ve known humans, when they fight for their lives, they are incredibly powerful. Make no mistake, I regarded Kagura well as my ally and as a comrade in battle in the end, but I also understand that her soul needs to be at rest.”
“I hope you’re right,” Natsumi said, turning to him, who was much closer to her than before. She fell into his golden eyes and felt like she could drown there. She’d never felt this way in Sesshoumaru’s presence before. She never had the chance to feel anything other than pain, but this man, no… this youkai, looked at her as if he cherished her, as if everything he did for her was out of genuine affection. It was… an odd feeling. She couldn’t figure out why he cared so much for her.
“I will help you,” he said, squeezing her shoulder before he pulled his hand away.
Another thought bothered her, and Natsumi mustered the courage to just ask him. “So...the way you felt about Kagura was different than how she felt. So does that mean you really don’t want her to take over my body at all? She’s willing to fight for you, to squash my soul and take over, but you are willing to help me instead? I just don’t understand why you’d go that far for me. I’m practically a stranger to you!”
Sesshoumaru paused for a moment, but Natsumi still felt his eyes on her, almost piercing through her very soul. “Natsumi-san, regardless of my past with Kagura, you have the right to live your life. It is yours, and having youkai magic interfere with your right to live is reprehensible. It’s unnatural, and I do not condone it. Nor do I condone the reason you’d lose your life to her this way. Kagura’s love for me is immaterial; she is dead and she redeemed herself, but time must move on. If I’m the reason for her regression back to a selfish, heartless demon, well I refuse to be a party to it.”
She slowly turned her head to him and said, “So you didn’t love her?”
He closed his eyes and frowned. “I did not, though I had some affections for her. I regarded Kagura as a comrade, and as someone who died nobly, and I only wanted peace for her, and for her to be free. If she would have survived, I am certain I would have developed deeper feelings for her. Yet, she sacrificed herself and her spirit has been free for hundreds of years. When she found reincarnation, I was curious… I wanted to see who she would become. I was intrigued by the concept of it; if Kagura could reincarnate, what could that mean for me? Still, I am unable to join the wheel, but if I could, I would like to do one more thing right for Kagura when I did care for her. I could make sure her reincarnation lived well, even if she did not want me in her life.”
“How could you say that!” Natsumi said. “I wouldn’t think that of you, Sesshoumaru-san. I am grateful for all that you’ve done for me, and well, I’m sorry that I have only felt grateful now. I was angry at first, and honestly I was scared because every time I even thought of you I’d feel nothing but pain, but I don’t want you to think I don’t want to know you.”
Natsumi covered her mouth, startled at her own outburst. “I’m sorry. Forgive me, I didn’t mean to offend you.”
Sesshoumaru stared at her, unbothered by her defense of him. Finally, with relief awash over his face, he said, “I am pleased you feel that way.”
Natsumi felt heat rush to her cheeks, enamored by his attention to her. She was even shocked at her own feelings. The more time she spent in his company, the more she realized she enjoyed being with him. Though she was still shocked that someone as gorgeous as Sesshoumaru would have any interest in someone like her, she wasn’t going to doubt herself anymore.
She felt Sesshoumaru genuinely was interested in her, and the more she learned about him, the more she started to understand how Kagura fell in love with him.
.