Inuyasha, "The Unquiet Winds" chapter 27: Save Me Natsumi, rated T

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Fandom: Inuyasha
Title: The Unquiet Winds
Chapter Title: Save Me Natsumi
Characters: Sesshoumaru, Kagura's reincarnation (inevitable Kagura/Sesshoumaru), Shippou
Genre: Romance/Supernatural/Suspense
Rating: PG-13 (overall)
Universe: Canon AU/divergence, Modern
Notes: This serial has been completed for wipbigbang  2020. You can find all the previous chapters HERE and HERE. I recommend you look for the previous chapters at AO3 and FFnet, as those chapters have also been updated with fixes for typos and grammar.
Additional Notes: Thank you to danceswithgary for the beautiful banner HERE.

Story Summary: Natsumi dreams of another woman's past, a woman who desperately wants to reunite with the man she loves, even if Natsumi has to suffer in the end.

Links: (RECOMMENDED) FFNet | AO3

Sesshoumaru was waiting for her leaning against his desk when his secretary ushered her inside without a word. He looked different than the night before when he revealed his youkai traits of silver hair and markings. Now, he was in his human disguise again, with his long black hair pulled back into a strict tail. He was wearing a crisp black suit with light pinstripes and a cranberry tie. He looked almost bored leaning against his desk as he waited, and when he met her eyes, his expression changed and his mood lightened. 

He looked relieved and happy to see her. In all her years as a lonely woman, she will never understand what someone like Sesshoumaru saw in her and how he could even regard her as he did. Natsumi promised herself she would never take Sesshoumaru’s affection for granted either.

“Shall we?” he asked, offering his arm to her. She nodded and he tucked her arm into his elbow as they departed the office together and headed to his car waiting for them.

He slid in next to her in the backseat of the car, and she enjoyed the feeling of awareness she had being so close to him and she was thankful she didn’t feel the usual pain. She turned to him, and noticed he was already looking at her. 

She smiled. “Um, I know I already said this but it is really nice to be next to you and not have a nose bleed.”

“I can understand that. I am happy for that as well,” he said. When he took her hand, Natsumi thought her heart would fly out of her chest. Her face felt hot again and she was sure she was as red as a tomato.

“This is so surreal,” she said quietly, almost as a whisper.

“Pardon?” he asked.

“Sorry, it’s just that nobody has ever been interested in me like this,” she said, and there was a heavy pause as the car began to drive them to the location of their lunch date. She had no idea where he was taking her, but she trusted him to pick something exquisite, probably somewhere she didn’t deserve. Wherever they were going, she would leave it up to him to plan.

“Then it is my honor to be the first,” Sesshoumaru said, and Natsumi gaped at him with disbelief he even said such a thing. So this was what it felt to be wooed by a man.

“Yes, and I’m glad it’s you. I’m glad that my feelings can flow freely now, of course, thanks to that miko’s tea,” she said. 

“Quite. But we cannot depend on tea forever. I would prefer that you never have to suffer from Kagura’s restless spirit again and that she can find peace,” he told her.

“Yeah, but it still seems… difficult,” Natsumi said with hesitation.

He squeezed her hand. “I will help you.”

She watched his gaze turn from her and look out the window as he became lost in thought. She wondered what he was thinking about as he definitely seemed bothered by some larger problem, and she wondered if it had to do with Kagura or if it was something else. 

She remembered Kagura’s message on the bus this morning. It still bothered her that Kagura was so intent on taking her over, that she didn’t think Natsumi was strong enough to save Sesshoumaru. 

But save him from what exactly?

Silence wedged between them for the rest of the drive to the restaurant; however, Sesshoumaru still held her hand, as if it was some sort of lifeline for him. It still awed her how much attention he had for her, and she wondered how long he’d been pursuing her. Hopefully more information would come to light as they got to know each other.

She knew that he’d searched out Kagura’s reincarnation when he knew that she had unnaturally gained a human body and soul. It was almost frightening to think that he’d always known about her, maybe as soon as she’d been born. 

Before Natsumi could dwell on that thought any further, the car arrived at their destination and the driver helped them out of the car. Sesshoumaru only released her hand for a moment to leave the car, but he held it out to her when she exited as well, and sure enough, he had taken her to some posh Western fusion restaurant with upper class people mingling inside. She followed beside him, her arm in his again as they approached the host station, and a beautiful young woman talked to him about their reservation. They were led to a secluded table in the corner with candles and flickering lights above them with a warm golden atmosphere all around them. Water and wine glasses were already at their seatings, with a bottle of Rose already chilling in the center. 

“Wow,” Natsumi said immediately as Sesshoumaru pulled out her seat for her to sit. He took his own seat across from her on the small table, and he watched her as Natsumi’s gaze swept around the high class restaurant with an awestruck smile.

“I thought you would enjoy this place,” he said lightly.

“I mean, of course, but even WacDonald’s would have been fine. This is way more than I deserve,” she said.

“I do not agree,” he said. “It would be rude of me to take you to such a place again, now as you can finally be in my presence without running away.”

Natsumi giggled. “Thank goodness for that.” 

Soon, they ordered, poured wine, and Natsumi talked about her unremarkable upbringing in Hokkaido, even though Sesshoumaru regarded her attentively. Finally, she changed the course of the conversation and mentioned what had happened to her this morning.

“Um, I feel I should tell you, but I had an encounter with Kagura this morning. I guess the tea had worn off to some degree and she was screaming at me in my head while I was on the bus to work.”

Sesshoumaru looked at her with concern, his expression turning cold. “I see. What did she say?”

“She said I wasn’t strong enough to be with you. She was really angry about being shut out and seemed even more persistent to take over my body.” Natsumi sighed and shook her head. “You’re right about one thing, Sesshoumaru-san. The tea isn’t enough. It won’t last forever and I can’t rely on it so much.”

“Yes, this is true. But I will help you deal with it. We will find a way to put Kagura’s spirit at rest,” he said, his words trying to soothe her anxiety again. He held out his hand and she took it automatically, craving his touch for some time since they arrived at their table. She felt a sense of peace as he held her hand, and she wished that they could do this more often. However, she was still worried that Kagura was right. Maybe she wasn’t strong enough, and maybe it would have been better for them both to keep Kagura away from him.

“Do you think it would be better if I stayed away from you? I don’t want to do that but… as strong as Kagura is…”

“No,” he said firmly, and she looked up at his defiant expression. “I refuse to allow her spirit to make you suffer for the rest of your life. It is unnatural. We must talk with Kagura and make her realize that what she is doing to you is wrong and unacceptable.”

“But…” She nodded at him but she was still unsure. He squeezed her hand, trying to reassure her.

“I understand how you feel, Natsumi-san,” he said gently, though his voice quickly turned to cold steel. “I will not permit you to be away from me. I promise you this.”

Natsumi gaped at him, unsure how to feel by such a declaration. Was that his official confession to her? She blushed, yet, something still bothered her.

“I trust you, Sesshoumaru-san, but I’m still worried about one thing that Kagura said to me,” she said. She could feel his golden eyes piercing into her again. She looked up and met his stare with all the strength she could muster.

“What did she mean when she told me that she could save you? Save you from what?”

Sesshoumaru stared at her for a grueling moment before saying anything. Finally he sighed and Natsumi realized that he had been holding back something from her after all. There was more to Sesshoumaru’s intentions than just having Kagura’s spirit find rest. 

“I suppose I cannot keep this from you any longer,” he said, and she’d never seen him look so troubled before in all the time she had known him.

“Natsumi-san, it may seem impossible to believe this, but I am dying,” he said, and Natsumi gasped, watching him with shock and worry.

“That doesn’t make sense. You’re youkai,” she said softly, looking around and hoping no one heard her.

“It is precisely because I am youkai that I’m dying,” he explained. “Many youkai have died from this disease that has plagued us the last hundred or so years. If humans don’t believe in us, or know us, then we start to fade. My mother faded not too long ago, and I was there with her when she descended to the youkai graveyard in Hell.”

“But then that means, Shippou-san…” Natsumi thought aloud. She had always suspected that Shippou was a youkai too by the way he talked, even though he never really came out and admitted it.

“Kitsune are not usually susceptible to the disease,” he said, and Natsumi felt some relief for her friend. “They have a lot of followers and still have humans that give them offerings and blessings. They also are experts at assimilating with humans. Shippou is at no risk from the disease as he is involved with the miko that created your tea.”

“Oh, I see,” she said, trying to wrap her brain around it. “So that means that if people believe in you as a youkai, then you won’t fade away from the disease?”

He continued, “Precisely. In my case, I have lived foolishly aloof and without the contact of humans for a long time. I believed that if I wrote my history in books that people may know of me, but even books will not save me. I have felt the beginning effects of disappearing already. My memories are already fuzzy and unreliable.”

“So… and forgive me if I offend you, but what does that have to do with me? Is this a separate issue from Kagura?” she asked.

He shook his head. “It is not separate. My regard for Kagura is my only purpose for being solid, and in turn, that involves you. I owe Kagura a debt of gratitude and though she seems like a monster to you, I cared about her very much and I have many regrets about my affection for her and that I did not do enough to appease her spirit.”

Natsumi felt her body go cold, instantly feeling the anguish that she felt so often when Kagura was awake inside her, sharing her memories with Natsumi of how she felt about Sesshoumaru. She felt empathy for the demoness, and now things were clear on what Sesshoumaru’s intentions were.

“But you said you didn’t want Kagura to take me over,” Natsumi said, her voice cracking from a rising sob.

“I do not want that. I want you, Natsumi. I want you to give me purpose,” he said, and his hand was squeezing hers again, that familiar strength of his that held her like a lifeline, and now she knew that literally was his lifeline - and his only option to remain alive.

“I’ve been alone for a very long time, fueled by selfishness and superiority. My solitary nature has become my death wish,” he said sadly. He sighed, as if he’d held onto this huge burden for centuries, and Natsumi assumed that he probably did.

And she understood his feelings. She’d known the sting of loneliness. She’d acted superior and aloof so many times in her life as well, and in the end it gained her nothing. She had so few friends, and the friends she could have had, the ones that wanted to be in her life, she had pushed them away. 

She released his hand and put hers over the top of his, stroking his soft skin lovingly. She smiled at him. “I understand how it is to be lonely.” He looked at her and she saw hope brighten on his face, like he really did have a chance to live and for her to be that reason to live. “And also, I think I know how Kagura feels too.”

“Thank you,” he said. 

“Now that I know this, you must tell me what I can do for you next,” she said.

Sesshoumaru nodded and took her hand again like before. “There is only one thing we need to do now. Kagura has to be at rest forever, and you need to live your life again without her interference, and once that happens, I have no doubt that you can help me… as long as you want to be in my life.”

“Of course,” she said with a brighter smile. “I understand.”

“We will need to visit the miko and she will help you meet Kagura on the spiritual plane,” he said. “We have all afternoon now, and if you’re willing, I’ll take you to her, as soon as we are done with lunch.”

“Hm!” Natsumi said, nodding happily. “Of course. I’m ready.”

.