Doctor Who, "No Light" Twelve x Clara, rated PG

[paynesgrey.livejournal.com]

Fandom: Doctor Who
Title: No Light
Author: Paynesgrey
Characters: Clara Oswald, The Doctor (Twelve), Clara x Twelve
Rating: PG
Word Count: 1,802
Spoilers: Christmas Special "Last Christmas"
Warnings: Current season spoilers.
Notes: Part of my Turn and Face the Strange unrelated snippets serial, ongoing. Written for sonicshambles for fandom-stocking on Dreamwidth.

Links: AO3 | FFnet

Serial Summary: Clara realizes she has to get to know the Doctor all over again; loving him, however, is a fixed point in time. These are unrelated snippets of the relationship between the Doctor (12) and Clara.



And I'd do anything to make you stay
No light, no light
No light
Tell me what you want me to say

"No light, No Light" – Florence and the Machine



Darkness.

Clara felt like she'd known it forever, and as time slipped by, she started to doubt her own mind of ever knowing light. It was endless, clawing at her, pushing against her temples and squeezing her brain.

Her only comfort was the Doctor's hand in hers. She'd woken up on a hard cold surface, and when she'd panicked, she'd grasped for anything and found him lying next to her, startled by her fear. When she'd ran her hand up his thin body, his familiarity quelled her fears. She jumped into his arms, and against his protests (even in the dark), she hugged him tightly as a life line.

When she'd finally calmed down enough to remove herself from him, she grabbed his hand, unable to let it go.

“Doctor? Where are we?”

“Don't know. Some sort of sensory deprivation chamber. No light, no sounds, no smells; well, except the sound of us talking together, but I can't seem to feel anything on where we are,” he said, and she heard him sniff.

“But why?” One minute they'd been exiting the TARDIS on a planet that the Doctor had known before. The light had been so bright she'd thought they'd need sunglasses. Shielding their eyes, Clara heard an awful sound. Mechanical and grating, as if a machine was malfunctioning and whining to be repaired.

Remembering, Clara felt brave enough to remove her hand from his and smack him. “I thought you knew this planet!”

“I did. Apparently, it changed,” the Doctor reasoned. “Or we're not at that planet but taken to another place altogether.”

“Well that's obvious,” Clara drawled.

“Not so obvious, Clara, that we don't know where we are or how to get out of this,” he said.

“I thought you were working on it,” she accused.

She heard his throat clear. “I haven't been...I've been holding a crying, scared woman's hand.”

“Humph,” she said. If she could glare at him with her “big eyes” in the dark, she would, but what would be the point? They couldn't see anything.

“Well, aren't you going to sonic something?” she asked.

She heard him patting his clothes. “It's been taken.”

“Great. So what's the point of taking us and putting us here? What do they want?”

“I guess, eventually we'll find out,” he said, and silence invaded again.

Clara decided that she could either feel around or take the Doctor's hand again. Taking his hand again was tempting. It was comforting, something she'd missed in all the months he'd been gone and they'd lied about being happy apart.

It had been a dreadful lie. She already regretted it. Now, Clara couldn't think to be out of the Doctor's sight. Oh, she kept up with her job at the school, but at least the days weren't miserable anymore. Her students and colleagues weren't watching her with sympathy every day. With the return of the Doctor, she'd gotten her light back, her smile, and her warmth.

She couldn't admit that to him. She supposed he wouldn't approve. He'd made that clear: not her boyfriend, and not even her hero, even though he really didn't have a vote on that.

Before she could decide, the Doctor had already been feeling around. He'd even stood up, started walking around. She'd hopped up next to him with a protest, and grabbed his arm so she wouldn't lose him. They walked around into more endless darkness, and step-by-step she could feel his patience wearing as thin as her own.

“What is this rubbish game?” he asked sourly. “I swear the first person I see is going to get a lot of swearing...”

“Doctor? What if this is some sort of prison?”

He stopped at her words, considering.

“It could be. We've tackled prisons before. They were more fun though. This is just boring,” he complained.

“Maybe that's the point,” Clara said.

“A prison for what?” he asked.

“A crime? What have you done lately, Doctor?”

He scoffed. “What have you done, Clara Oswald?”

“I really think you've done more than me, Doctor. You are two thousand years old,” she said. She could hear him get ready to banter with her, but they were paused by strange disembodied laughing. Standing still, they both craned to listen.

“Doctor...”

“Shhh,” he said, and she obliged, although she didn't want to. He started to move in another direction and she stayed with him. If he had some idea, Clara would follow him.

**

They continued to walk endlessly but at least they were starting to smell something, like soap, which was a new experience since the laughter. The Doctor began following the smell, and Clara made a note that the concrete floor was starting to shift like sand under their shoes.

The Doctor's temper had worn, and his mood was worse. His answers to Clara's curiosity were becoming short and she was becoming more sarcastic.

“Well at least the floor feels different, and the smell is getting stronger. We can get out here finally and be on our way,” Clara said.

“Yes, on our way. Where to next? I don't know if I can handle another trip with your incessant jabbering for awhile. Maybe we wait until Wednesday. Maybe you can find another date,” the Doctor droned.

“Or, you can lie and tell me you are going on your honeymoon with the Master. Oh, sorry, Missy. I'm still working that out,” Clara said.

“OH, you are a charming little ...” The Doctor spun to face her, and she knew that even in the darkness. She could feel his anger as much as her own, with their nerves frayed from this endless nothingness, she was ready to take him up on that offer for a little break.

“Oh, shut it,” he said finally, turning from her and quickening his pace. He'd left her arm and went without her, and she stomped off after him, anger fueling her need to catch up.

What was she thinking? She'd thought she'd loved him. She'd thought he was her life now, and without him, she was a shadow of herself, but did she really give herself so little credit? The impossible girl! She was not impossible, and she could be normal if she wanted, and she could have a normal boyfriend (even if the other one was dead) and she didn't need to love the Doctor. She didn't need him!

“You know, Doctor, you could have let me believe you were fine. You could have left me and picked a new companion and have them stare at you in awe, and you could have told them how clever and wonderful you are, and they would be ordinary and normal and you could wow them with your shiny snog box and leave me be!”

“And I'm telling you I couldn't have!” he shouted at her, which took Clara aback.

“And why not?” Clara challenged him.

“Because! Because you're an idiot!” the Doctor said, and then he began to grumble. “We are just getting on, and you want me to find some other pudding brain and break them in and let them into my life and annoy me with their stupidity and try my patience and exasperate me into teaching them basic things, and do you know how much work that is?” he said, his thick Scottish accent coming out.

“I just wanted to hear you say it,” Clara said, feeling satisfied.

“Well, here we are then!” another unfamiliar voice interrupted. “It was about time!”

Clara squinted when the lights came on. She hissed from the stark difference, even though they came on at a soft orange hue not to shock her senses.

She and the Doctor turned around to the origin of the voice. A short, blue-skinned alien woman in light yellow robes smiled serenely at them. “We'd wondered when you'd get the rest of that negativity out. It took you quite a while. Your chakras were extremely blocked. Especially you, Timelord. Especially your Hearts chakra.”

“Nonsense. Space hippie new age nonsense,” the Doctor scoffed with offense.

“Where are we? We were supposed to go to the Planet Qi,” Clara asked.

“You are at the Planet Qi, but we have enacted new laws. We do not allow tourists on the surface until they have purged their negativity below 20%. The Doctor's levels here took some considerable time to fall below the accepted norm.”

“That makes sense,” Clara said.

“He is still very close,” the alien clarified, and Clara giggled. The Doctor glared at her.

“So, the Planet Qi of relaxation has gone political,” the Doctor said. “I never thought such a thing.”

“Since the wars, we've had to make some changes. We do not want negative energy here. Yet, we invited you, Doctor, to this planet to gain some relaxation after word spread about your time at Trenzalore.”

“Word spread?” the Doctor looked at her suspiciously.

“Why yes, there have been many transmissions from another Timelord, a Timelady even, broadcasting your new life and victory at Trenzalore against the Daleks,” she answered.

Clara met the Doctor's eyes. They knew exactly who that Timelady was.

“Well, then, you had to get rid of our negativity by depriving us of sanity in complete darkness?” the Doctor asked, furrowing his brow.

“Like the legend of our people on Qi, when the Great Goddess rose from the underworld, she claimed all the suffering, anger and hatred of her peoples to consume for sustenance, leaving the people of Qi clean and healed and at peace before she returned below. She returns yearly to eat our sins and negativity, and every year we are cleansed. We needed to cleanse you by bringing out your anger.”

“Well, you didn't get all of it. I still have a lot of anger in there,” the Doctor said in annoyance.

“Indeed, but with your companion, you are mildly peaceful,” the alien said.

Clara coughed. “Can I get that in a recording? I'd like that for my ringtone.”

“Oh, shut it,” the Doctor said and rolled his eyes. Clara laughed and slid her arm under his. The Doctor did not complain.

“So, now that we've passed the exam, um, what's next?” Clara asked the alien.

“Now, if you like, we would like to direct you to the Blue Smoke Hot Springs,” she said with a big smile. Clara bounced.

“That's more like it!” Clara said, and she looked up at the Doctor. A small smile curled on his lips briefly.

“Ready?” she asked him. “And don't pout. This was why we came here in the first place! It was your idea.”

“Yes, ma’am,” and reluctantly, the Doctor followed Clara's lead.

END